Apple hand pies.
So, tell me I’m not the only one out there that thinks that name suggests some weird cross between the famous American Pie scene, a sexual act and just good old fashion pie.
I mean, I get it. They fit in your hand. You eat them with your hand, unlike regular pie. But, it just feels wrong as it rolls off my tongue.
Let’s talk about these glorious little, albeit weirdly named things.
Here’s the deal in a nutshell….they’re the perfect lazy man’s pie. They’re quick, you can pretty much fill them with whatever you want and you don’t have to fuss with a crust.
I mentioned Ulysses’ unexpected 4 day trip the other day, so being the good wife that I am, I thought I’d make him something I know he loves when he came home. Besides pumpkin pie, apple pie is pretty much the only dessert he even cares about. 10 pounds of chocolate could land in his lap and he’d pay it no attention (I’m not sure how I overlooked this obvious flaw when agreeing to marry him) but he will house an entire apple pie in about a day.
So, I figured without any pie crusts (or the desire to make my own) but with plenty of apples on hand, I’d try to create my own little apple treat for him.
The puff pastry is as easy as thawing, rolling out and cutting circles with the rim of a glass (or a round cookie cutter if you have one, I do not).
The apple mixture is as easy as finely chopping and throwing every “fall” spice you have in a sauce pan. Your house will pretty much smell like the best Yankee candle you can imagine and you didn’t even need to pay $385646098 for it!
Brush a little egg on top and they come out deliciously golden brown from the combination of that and the butter in the puff pastry. Perfect little bites of wannabe apple pie.
I pulled them out of the oven, even texted him a picture (hoping it might entice him to come home from work earlier…no such luck) and patted myself on the back for being such a thoughtful wife.
He came home, we ate dinner and then we sat down on the couch with 2 of these and some vanilla ice cream and you know what he said?
“They’re ok, they don’t really taste like pie though”
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!
They’re HAND pies! They’re not REAL pie. They’re made of puff pastry, not pie crust. Of course they don’t taste like REAL pie. They’re a shortcut. A shortcut you WERE SUPPOSED TO LIKE.
Guess who’s eaten all the damn hand pies since?
*Note, there’s nothing wrong with these pies (what the heck could be wrong with puff pastry, apples, spices and sugar?) in fact, I thought they were pretty darn good especially for their effort! Ulysses is apparently just a pie snob.
- 1 sheet puff pastry, thawed
- 1 apple, diced
- 2 teaspoons sugar
- ½ teaspoon lemon juice
- 1 teaspoon cinnamon
- ¼ teaspoon nutmeg
- ¼ teaspoon cloves
- 1 tablespoon cornstarch
- 2½ tablespoons water
- 1 egg, beaten
- Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper or silpat.
- Roll puff pastry sheet out with rolling pin until it’s almost half the original thickness.
- Cut out circles with the rim of a glass or cookie cutter.
- In a small bowl, combine cornstarch and water and whisk together. Set aside.
- In a small sauce pan over medium heat, combine remaining ingredients and cook for 2-3 minutes until apples start to soften.
- Add cornstarch mixture and continue cooking until liquid cooks off. Remove from heat, set aside.
- Spoon about a tablespoon of the apple mixture onto the puff pastry circles.
- Fold the puff pastry over creating a half circle and pinch the sides together. Place on baking sheet.
- Brush each folded circle with the egg wash.
- Bake for 20-25 minutes, until golden brown.